Boston
Hash House Harriers

a drinking club with a running problem

Hash Trash

Missed a hash? Catch up on all the trash here...

| Track Stars Dirty 30 Hash | The Gap Hash |

Track Stars Dirty 30 Hash (about 9 years ago)
I decided I couldn't hash again until I finished this hash trash (I am
caught up, because the remaining notes are for really old hashes, and all
mixed up). In a sense of deja vu, the Robbie Burns hash today starts at the
Swillo, same as this hash. So this may revive memories of terrain.

Also good news, although it's cold, it looks like the first Sunday in awhile
without snow (so I have no shoveling!).

-- Cums Alone

Track Stars Dirty 30 Hash
WHEN: Sunday, November 5, 2008, 2:30 pm HST
WHERE:
A: Silhouette Lounge, Allston
B: The Kells, Brighton Ave, Allston
Whiskey check: up the stairs by Brighton High School
Beer Checks: (1) behind Franciscan Children's rehab hospital (2) among the
boulders at the Stanley Ringer Playground
HARES: Going Down Syndrome, Super Teflon Dong, Floppy Dick
BAG CAR: Just Stacy
WEATHER: it was okay weather, a bit chilly, but not snowing or raining

HASHERS PRESENT (in addition to the hares, and bag car driver). Note, for
this hash, I decided to be lazy and let hashers write down there own names.
Only two problems with that: some hashers have poor penmanship (possibly
due to beer consumption), and some get "creative" with their hash names
(thanks a lot). Here are the names (it was a huge pack):
Clit Van Winkle, Sugar Plum Fairy, Mr. Papageogio (aka High An*s), Dirty
Latte Sanchez, Cum is Kosher, Catheter the Great, Knob Gobbler, Cums Early,
Sux to Blow, European Whore, Just Jenn (note 2 "n's", I hope she got a name
that reflects that), Just Jack, Just Mike, 6DOB, Just Katelyn, Just Laine, I
Eat Tea Bags, Just Alex, Fire in the Hole, Shorn Scrotum, Crucifux,
Immaculate Erection, Just Alex (again?), SATRAC, IEC, Stick it to the Bros,
Hareclub for Queers, Peppermint Pussy, Just Angelique, Bend Over Mommy, Goes
Down on Buoys, plus me Cums Alone (and if people didn't write down their
names, they are missing

Virgin: Tania. ... speaking of missing: Lost Virgin: Karl

The Start, the trail, the on-in:

Hashers milled about the lovely Swillo bar. It hasn't changed much from
when it was a smoky dive bar ... other than being able to breathe. The pack
circled behind the bar for an explanation of marks. The back of the pack
walkers had a map to follow. It was quite amusing watching the FRBs run to
and fro, zigzagging across true trail through the bowels of Allston. The
beer check was at the top of a rocky promontory behind the Franciscan
Children's rehab hospital off Cambridge Street. It was scenic if slippery.

From there the walkers got a short cut to the second beer check, thus we
missed the shot check (and a very long flight of stairs). We probably got
to the second beer check at the same time the FRBs got to the shot check, so
we had a long time to examine the detritus at the second beer check. There
was a mattress and some very soiled panties that were next to a boulder (we
put hazard marks on the boulder so the rest of the pack would avoid the
area). Of course the warning was to no avail, as a hasher picked them up
with a stick and started throwing the panties around (they kind of looked
like granny panties).
The pack took its time at the second beer check, and it was twilight before
everyone moved on to the on-in.

The On-In

The on-in venue was a surprise. The Kells is a nice bar, kind of swanky by
hash standards, but at that hour I don't think they are normally open, so we
had the place to ourselves (I don't think their usual clientele would be
terribly amused).

Eventually, the pack had beers, and the circle commenced, with Buoys as RA.
Comments on the trail included: It sucked, Nice, No more broken glass, Dirty
STD panties, itty bitty chalk, not enough shots for the walkers, not enough
hookers, No package check, etc.

Among the many down downs were:

Private Party: Crucifux, SATRAC, and a bunch of others
Hash Crash: Just Alex
FRBs: I Eat Cum, Stick it to the Bros
FBI: Fire in the Hole


Virgins: Tanya was there. Virgin Karl got lost on trail and was nowhere to
be found. The bartender, Allie was also roped into the circle. They were
demented, and welcomed to the hash.

Namings:

Just Michelle was due for a name. She was not named Size Queen, Daisy
Dicks, Jamaican Jerk, Cranberry F*ck, Yeast Love, Tall Drink of Piss, nor A
Face I can Come on. She was finally named Jamaican Me Cum.

Just Jack was also due for a name. He was not named: Cougar Lover, Walker
Stalker, Jack on Jack off, nor Grandma May I. He was named Necrophiliac
Jack.

Just Kaitlin was also due to be named. We lost our momentum however, and
she was not named any of the following: Not so Flexible, EZ Brake Hymen,
Clumsy C*nt, Cums in the Woods, Pool of Cum, Loose Lips Sucks Ships, Wet
Spot, EZ Free Condom, Woody the Woodpecker Filler.

There was an accusation about wearing race shirts. Crucifux apparently was
wearing one, but was no where to be found ... except in the men's room
downstairs with another hasher. The pack went downstairs to call on her and
give her a down down.

After that side event, the pack did a quick hash religion, and we adjourned
to eat an assortment of provided appetizers and mini pizzas.

Cums Alone, Scribe

The Gap Hash (over 9 years ago)
This is the long over due Hash Trash from The Gap 2008And this what you missed.....

Hare on Friday: I Eat Cum
Hare on Saturday: Counterfeit Dick, Sunday - Jimmy Crack Whore 
The Pack: There was none, it was all traveling freaks!!!
Visitors: Sea Coast's only life guard; Friar Fu*k, Hartford's southern bell; Virgin Italian Pisser, Cumbridge's only smat kid Krusty the Meat Miser; and last but not least from Boston's Charles Street Jail the notorious; Wang Chunks and his posy (Super Teflon Dong, Nambla, Taint My Problem, Stretch Pussy, Schindler's Fist, Cruifux, Hiscocksin, Spunk In The Trunk, The Clam Burlger (Just Ricki), Pubic Service Announcement, Shorn Scrotum, Floppy Dick, Dude Where's My Virginity?, Beat by a Girl, C*m is Kosher and My Chemical Homance 

The Trails...
Friday Night's Pub Crawl - Trail started from the camp sights as I Eat Cum scampered off. Trail was Long and Hard as it twisted and turned down the campground roads. The first Beer Check was in the parking lot of the campground as it was the only bar in town. After the first round of Miller lite, food was ordered and devoured like a pack of wild Indians. As the pack finished there last supper trail found its was back to the camp sites, as there were 3 Kegs of beer awaiting the mob. With a swift call of ON-ON trail left and aimed towards the brass balled Indian across the street. Awaiting the pack was test tub shots of ice cold After Shock. The only shock to be had was the hashers pillaging the Indian looking for there own lead weights. Before getting scalped trail led back to the camp site's once again before the kegs ran dry.

Saturday- The River "Trail"- "Hared" by Counterfeit Dick, "Trail" by Mother Nature. The weather was great, and the Fife Brook Damn gave us a perfect water release.

The pack of about 25 Hashers on tubes was away into the Deerfield river at 1230. After the first ten minutes Friar Fuck was already lost to the pack, we knew he would catch up, the river only flows downhill. After 40 minutes of leisurely tubing we arrived at the first beer check, at the railroad bridge near the Hoosic Tunnel. STD entertained the pack with his rope swing prowess as we enjoyed some PBR and Genny Cream Ale. Friar rejoined the pack just in time for a beer before we were on-on again.

About an hour later we made it down to the Gap, the wankers that walked around know who they are, but they don't really know what they missed. Those that rode it out can now proudly call themselves "Gap Douches". Most notable among the douches was Clam Burglar, not only did she get dumped from her tube but she offered a pair of sunglasses and a borrowed hat as sacrifice to the gap. The pack enjoyed another round of cheap beer then continued on-on, with out I Eat Cum, Wang Chunks, Hiscocksin, and I can't remember who else (they went back to camp by car).

We had a relaxing ride avoiding raft collisions for about another hour to the last beer check, then on-on to the camp site and hot food which Cum's Mom delivered, along with a birthday cake for her little birthday boy.

Over all we spent about 5 hours on the river, including beer checks.

Lost Shit - Stella (Counterfeit Dick's Mug) last known where abouts, driving down to TITS, Virgina; Hartford's Hash Shit (VIP) last known where abouts, I Eat Cum's Kitchen Sink.